The Girl Upstairs
by Junebugsm
Summary: After finally being released from the hospital, Callie finds herself struggling to fit into a family - especially one as loving as the Fosters. It's up to Stef and Lena to teach Callie how to accept her place with them and to believe that she's worth it.
1. Chapter 1

**After finally being released from the hospital, Callie finds herself struggling to fit into a family - especially one as loving as the Fosters. It's up to Stef and Lena to teach Callie how to accept her place with them and to believe that she's worth it.**

(Sequel to Girl Next Door.)

* * *

Callie opened her eyes and stared up at the blank ceiling. She found it strange when she didn't see the bright, industrial lights and the ceiling panels of the hospital that she was now so used to, but instead the early sunlight streaming through the leaves outside the window. She took a deep breath and let it out slowly; today was a whole new day and with it came a whole new chapter in her life.

"Good morning love." Stef said as she poked her head into the room that Callie now shared with Mariana, and found the girl's eyes open. "Sleep well?"

Callie nodded but didn't look away from the ceiling. It was almost as though the blank white paint was giving her answers that she'd been searching for.

"How about some breakfast?" Stef questioned, knowing that the girl would need some time to get used to her surroundings and feel comfortable. "Lena's making cinnamon buns and the kitchen smells heavenly." She smiled, hoping to entice her new guest.

"Okay." Callie said softly as she began to sit up, using the help of her hands to get her healing knee to the edge of the bed. It was still sore and stiff and and though Callie was able to get around a bit, she still needed a lot of help and support.

"Up you go." Stef said, putting an arm around the girl and helping her up despite the dull ache of her own injury. "We'll get you downstairs and then hang out there for the rest of the day - it's going to be just you and me." She smiled gently, hoping that Callie would feel just a little less awkward with the thought that it was just the two of them like it was back in the hospital.

* * *

Callie slowly made her way towards the kitchen but she may as well have been entering the circus - Lena and Mariana were arguing about Mariana's choice of outfits while Lena was simultaneously having a conversation with Jude; Jesus was teasing Mariana about why she'd chosen this particular outfit in the first place and Brandon was struggling to finish some homework that he'd put off till the last minute.

"I don't care, it's too revealing." They heard Lena say. "No one needs to see that much of your body."

"Except Chase." Jesus teased his sister who was newly crushing on the star of the school play.

"Wait, Chase Dillon? That guy's a duche." Brandon added his two cents, half listening to the conversation as he tried to get his trigonometry homework done.

"Don't worry, it'll be okay." Lena said to Jude, ignoring the bickering of her other children.

"Maybe, but he's Mariana'sduche." Jesus teased in a flirty voice. "That's the only reason why she even joined the school play."

"Shut up." Mariana snapped at both her brothers before turning back to her mother. "Mama, this is totally inright now, all the girls are wearing it." She said, pointing to the black boob-tube that her mother was so against.

"That can be inas long as you stay in." Stef announced as she and Callie made their way towards the table. "Put something more appropriate on or don't leave this house, take your pick." She ordered.

"Aah, you guys are like nuns." Mariana grumbled but left the table and headed upstairs to change.

Stef glanced at Lena and shared a private smile at the fact that they were slowly getting their daughter back. She still tended to have moments of guilt, but for the most part she was back to her old self.

"It's just the basics. It's not a major test." Lena said to Jude as she offered him another cinnamon bun.

"What test?" Callie asked with a frown as Lena set a plate in front of her as well.

"Jude has his placement test for Anchor Beach this afternoon." Lena explained.

"Doesn't he just, like, get in, because he lives in the area?" Callie asked.

"No." Lena said. "That's only public schools. He needs to take a placement test and score at grade level to get in." She explained.

"Aren't you like the vice principal or something?" Callie pointed out, wondering why Lena didn't just wave a magic wand and get him in.

"It doesn't work like that here." Lena smiled in amusement at what Callie was implying.

"Well, so what does he have to do?" The young girl questioned defensively.

"Just basic general knowledge, history, grammar, and math." Lena said, brushing it off as no big deal. The last subject caused the two siblings to glance nervously at each other.

"Does it have to be today?" Callie asked, hoping to buy her brother some time. "Can't it wait?"

"For what?" Lena asked in surprise. "He has to start school."

"He can start when I start." Callie offered, knowing she had a while before she would be cleared for school.

"Honey, it's going to take you weeks, maybe even a month, before you can go to school." Lena said gently, realizing that separating the kids again, even for just a few hours, seemed to agitate them both.

"Well, what happens if I don't get in?" Jude questioned, knowing that there was a good chance of that happening with his math skills.

"We put you in the public school" Lena answered easily. "It's a good school too, just not the same school the other kids go to."

"Don't worry baby, if you do go to public school, I'll join you there." Callie offered with a gentle smile as the two older women looked on.

* * *

"Do you really think I'm that stupid?" Stef questioned when Mariana reentered the room in a slightly loose, long sleeve top.

"What?" Mariana questioned, avoiding looking directly at her mother as she quickly grabbed her backpack.

Everyone at the table looked on curiously as they wondered what Stef was talking about. Mariana was much more appropriately dressed so there was nothing they found wrong.

"Go upstairs and change this minute." Stef said firmly, giving her daughter a look that told her she wasn't messing around.

Mariana finally looked at her mother, trying to gauge just how sure Stef was of her hunch and when it became apparent that Stef wasn't going to back down she huffed one more time as she dumped her bag back down. "How the hell do you always know?" She questioned rhetorically as headed back upstairs, pulling off the new top to reveal the same boob-tube she had on earlier.

That was the first time that Callie had ever truly seen Stef in the role of a parent. Through their time in hospital, though Stef had taken on a more protective, guiding role; she had always been a friend but now she began to realize that that Stef and this one weren't the same.


	2. Chapter 2

"So, I was thinking that maybe this weekend we could go and get you some clothes and shoes." Stef suggested to Callie as the two sat in the back yard for some fresh air.

"Fine." Callie said, not looking at Stef but instead staring distractedly at the flowers surrounding the yard.

"Is there anything else you need right now?" Stef questioned wondering if she was forgetting anything.

Callie shook her head, still seemingly distracted by her thoughts.

"What you thinking about?" Stef asked curiously, wondering what had got the girl so focused.

"Jude." Callie answered without missing a beat, the concern clear in her voice.

"It's just a simple test love." Stef tried to reassure Callie. "Basic stuff everyone knows. It's just a requirement and every kid has to take it. I'm sure he's doing just fine." She assured.

"He's been in six schools in six years, I highly doubt he's doing fine." Callie shot back somewhat bitterly as she lowered her head so that her hair formed a curtain between herself and Stef.

As Stef thought about it, she realized that maybe Jude wasn't doing as fine as she hoped considering the circumstances. "It's a good school honey, and the teachers will understand Jude's problem. They will give him the help he needs. They have remedial classes and different level programs and they'll get him where he needs to be." She paused to tuck the hair that was hiding her face behind her ear. "Besides, Lena isn't going to let him slip through the cracks." She assured, hoping to ease Callie's mind with the knowledge that someone familiar was there to look out for her brother.

"If he get's in." Callie pointed out. She did appreciate everyone's efforts at trying to help them out but things had a way of just screwing up for her and there seemed to be nothing she could do about it.

"I've never dealt with the public school personally, but a lot of friends kids go there and they don't have problems with it. It's a good school too and if Jude does need something more than that school can offer then we'll get it for him at home." Stef said, understanding that for Callie it wasn't just a fact.

Callie thought about it for a bit and realized that there wasn't much she could do about any of this. Stef and Lena had both expressed, several times, that they would do whatever they had to for Jude and she just had to give them that chance. So far they had never let her down and Callie was slowly learning to look past people's mistakes before judging them.

"You're so unlike any foster parent I've ever met." Callie stated, seemingly changing the subject out of nowhere.

Stef smiled slightly. "We care about you and Jude." She replied. "We may not be in a position to help every kid out or even for long term but we will do whatever we can. We won't just turn a blind eye and pretend we don't see what you need." She said full of emotion.

Callie smiled slightly, looking back at the flowers as she considered what she'd just been told. "My shoes are fine." She finally said, softly.

"Huh?" Stef asked in confusion as she looked at the brunette with a frown.

Callie looked back at Stef. "I don't need new shoes." She said. "These are fine."

Stef nodded, accepting what Callie was saying. But she was surprised when Callie continued.

"Jude could use a new jacket though." She said softly, her gaze moving to the distance, just over Stef's left shoulder. "He outgrew his and he tends to get cold easily."

Stef nodded as she studied the girl in front of her. She couldn't decide whether she should be happy that Callie had directly asked her for something or sad that she only asked because it was for Jude. Stef had hoped that once Callie found her brother and knew he was safe that maybe she wouldn't worry about him so much and would care for herself more but clearly that wasn't the case for she still seemed to think that only Jude was important.

* * *

"...And it's right on the beach." Jude said excitedly as he dropped himself down beside Callie on the living room couch while the twins and Brandon headed up to their rooms to do their own thing. "Just wait till you see it."

"I remember that feeling the first time I saw it too." Stef added.

"It sounds awesome baby." Callie smiled at him, surprised to find him in such a good mood considering he'd had to take a test today. "How was the test?"

Jude glanced at Lena who smiled encouragingly at him. "We'll get the results tomorrow." She said. "But either way, remember, we are going to do whatever we need to help you no matter what school you go to."

Jude nodded as he understood what Lena was saying though he couldn't deny the nerves he felt nor the hope that he would get in - he liked the school, he liked Lena and most of all he liked being a part of this family even if it was just in a small way and he wanted the chance to experience all of it.

* * *

For about fifteen minutes it was just the four of them sitting in the living room with Jude doing most of the talking as he gave Callie every little detail he could about the school and how Lena had taken him on a tour and most of the classes had a view of the beach and the older kids even got free time to surf or swim and some sports happened right there in the sand.

But eventually, much too soon for Callie, Jude ran off to wash up after being at school and the other kids came down demanding their mothers' attention looking for a snack, help with homework, permission for something or the other and Callie was left alone while the real family continued their lives without her.

Dinner was also filled with chatter that Callie couldn't really keep up with. Everything was about school and friends and plans that she had nothing to do with and even Jude had inputs for he had at least met some of their friends and seen the school and he'd already been in the house for four days while Callie had now lived here for just over twenty-four hours.

"I mean, she's really good." Jesus was telling everyone. "No one on the team even treats her like a girl - she's as good as one of the guys." He explained.

"Better not talk about her so much or Lexi is gonna get jealous." Mariana told her brother who was still stunned by the strength and abilities of the tiny girl he'd just met that day.

"Please, Emma is no girl." Jesus shook his head. "She knocked me down in seconds. She could probably take Brandon out with just her little finger."

"Hey!" Brandon frowned insulted at being considered so weak.

"Jesus." Lena chastised gently. She agreed that her oldest son wasn't exactly Hercules but he had his strengths in other areas and she was immensely proud of him for it.

"She really was good though." Jesus confirmed. "And she's apparently smart too. She's in some nerdy club that solves math problems for fun."

"Well then I guess then Lexi really doesn't have anything to worry about." Mariana ended. "She's clearly out of your league."

"Shut up." Jesus shot back. "At least I'm not chasing after a drama weirdo."

"Chase is like the most popular guy in school." Mariana reminded him. "All the girls love him."

"That's because they consider him one of them." Jesus replied with a laugh. "He's such a dramatic wuss.

"Enough." Stef and Lena called in unison before things turned into a fight.

"Can we please talk about something else that doesn't involve insulting anyone." Stef requested.

"Fine." Mariana agreed, thinking of something else to talk about. "When are you guys planning on getting married?" She finally asked of the topic that seemed to have basically been shelved ever since the whole drama of Callie finding out that Stef was a cop.

"We're not sure yet." Stef replied. "There are just so many things going on right now, we were thinking of just doing down to city hall and having it registered."

At this Mariana truly looked concerned. "Wait, What? No." She said miserably. "You can't just skip the wedding." She said aghast.

"Sweetheart, we just have so much on our plates right now we don't have the time to plan a wedding." Stef explained apologetically.

"I'll do it." Mariana quickly offered. "I'll plan it all, you won't have to do a thing except show up and say 'I Do'. Please, you guys really deserve this." She said.

Her eyes were filled with so much hope that her mothers would allow her the honor of planning their wedding and they could see that she needed this - it was her way of making up for her mistakes. Lately she'd been swinging between her own usual bubbly self and the guilt that she still so obviously felt.

Stef and Lena glanced at each other - both thinking the very same thing - we don't need a fancy wedding but this seems to be exactly what Mariana needs.

"Okay." Stef finally relented. "You can be our wedding planner but nothing too fancy or expensive. We are on a very tight budget."

"Whatever you say." Mariana agreed without a fuss. "I won't go crazy but it'll be beautiful I promise. You guys really deserve a real wedding."

Both Stef and Lena smiled and nodded as Mariana's own smile grew to light up her face and she clapped triumphantly. "This is going to be amazing." She said gleefully and proceeded to list all the things that they would need to get done.

* * *

"I can do it by myself." Callie snapped as Stef and Lena helped her into the shower stall in their bathroom. The girl was wrapped in a towel ready for a shower but the two women had insisted on helping her in and out of the shower at least for they weren't sure her knee could carry her weight as she got in.

"I'm sure you can." Stef replied, unfazed by Callie's attitude. "But if you want to shower and wash your hair then the deal is that we help you in and out and you sit on the stool while you shower otherwise I'm not leaving the bathroom."

Callie rolled her eyes and let out a frustrated breath as she lowered herself onto the plastic stool that Lena had put into the stall for her and then waited for the two of them to leave the bathroom before unwrapping the towel from around herself.

"Just yell when you're done." Lena reminded her right before they walked out. "We just don't want you to slip and fall honey." She added gently, hoping to make the teen feel less crowded.


	3. Chapter 3

"Come on love, you have to eat." Stef coaxed Callie the following morning. "You're still on painkillers and you can't take them on an empty stomach."

"I ate a toast." Callie reminded the woman hovering over her at the kitchen table while the regular morning chaos went on about them.

"That's not enough." Stef stated adding a spoonful of scrambled eggs, two strips of bacon and a banana to the girls plate. "Finish that up and then you have to head out, your physiotherapy appointment is in under and hour and Len…" She trailed off as her attention was diverted.

Callie groaned and shook her head as Stef turned her attention towards her two sons who were fighting about who forgot to take the trash out the night before. Back at the hospital Stef would have sat beside her and held her hand and ate with her but now she barely had the time to even finish a sentence. Callie had dreamed of being a part of Stef's family but what she'd never considered was that Stef didn't necessarily want her as a part of her family - the woman already had a family including children she already loved. Yes, she cared for Callie and they had become friends in the hospital but that was back when Stef had no one around and Callie was the only available companion.

"Brandon, would you just take the garbage out please." Stef finally ordered her eldest son.

"Why me?" Brandon argued. "It wasn't my turn." He complained.

"Because I'm telling you to." Stef said. She refrained from mentioning that his breakfast was almost already done while Jesus was still only half way through and still had to take his pill on top of it all. To top it all of her daughter still had yet to make an appearance at the breakfast table and would have no time for anything if she didn't hurry. "MARIANA". She called up the stairs as she shook her head at the amount of stress her kids could cause.

In the midst of all this she spotted Jude sitting next to Callie and scraping the last of his breakfast onto his fork, eating quietly and watching the chaos around him. She smiled at the young boy who hadn't caused an ounce of trouble since the moment he came to stay with him. He got along with everyone and he was polite and helpful and so timid and shy in so many ways that Stef often thought he was younger than his thirteen years. She walked towards Jude and affectionately ruffled his hair. "You are my favorite." She remarked playfully. "You don't cause any trouble." She winked at him making Callie smile.

At least one great thing was that Jude was in a safe, loving home and they were together. If nothing else then Stef had given them that. Callie's thoughts were distracted by Mariana coming down the stairs with a very determined, very excited look on her face.

"What do you think of this?" She began as she took a seat at the table next to Jesus and reached for some toast and fruit. "A white and silver themed wedding with white flowers all around with silver decorations in them and silver twirlers all around and the only colored accents will be the bouquets you and mama hold, the sash on my dress and the Brandon and Jesus' ties. I was thinking we could do a bright pink." She said smiling but it faded a bit when she noticed Stef's face. "Or we could go with a maroon or a royal blue instead." She offered, trying to think of what blue flowers they could get.

"Let's wait for mama." Stef suggested of the woman who had left early for school in order to be back in time to take Callie for her physiotherapy since Stef was still not cleared to drive.

"Fine." Mariana agreed, convinced that the younger woman would be more likely to agree with her vision of the celebration. "Anyway…" She carried on with her ideas. "Your dads can walk you down the aisle and Brandon, Jesus and I can be your bridesmaids…" She paused before glancing at the two in question. "Bridespeople." She corrected. "And for the food we can keep it simple - loads of appetizers and finger foods - elegant, not the backyard party kind…" She was quick to clarify but was interrupted by her mother.

"That's a great idea." Stef stated. "We can do it in the backyard. God knows ours is big enough and it will save us from renting a place."

"Okay fine." Mariana agreed reluctantly since she had promised to keep the budget low. "But the food still has to be better." She insisted. "And along with the appetizers we can do two heavy salads to fill up - pasta in a spinach and cream sauce and a cold chicken and pineapple salad."

"You really have thought this through haven't you." Stef smiled in awe at how quickly her daughter had put together what seemed like a picture perfect wedding.

"Well yeah." Mariana shrugged, her eyes filling with the guilt that appeared far too often still. "You guys deserve a perfect wedding and I want to give it to you."

Stef watched Mariana, a pain in her heart that the girl still felt so guilty for Stef's injury. This wedding truly seemed to be the antidote to that guilt and Stef decided then and there that she would give her daughter this chance and as long as she stuck to their budget then she would pick whatever she deemed fit.

"It sounds wonderful sweetheart." Stef smiled and assured Mariana and watched as the young Latina's face once again filled with pride and excitement.

* * *

Callie gritted her teeth and clenched both her fists as tight as she could as she made her way up the stairs. She'd managed not to cry all through physiotherapy and the twenty minute ride home and she'd be damned if she'd begin crying now when she was so close to being alone in Mariana's room. Lena had offered to help her several times - first from the clinic to the car and then from the car to the house and again when she reached the bottom of the stairs but Callie had declined. Luckily for her Stef was nowhere in sight and Callie hoped to make it to the room before she was found.

With a shuddering sigh she collapsed onto the bed and slowly she let the tears fall as the pain radiated through her leg. Physiotherapy was worse than the shattered leg had been she thought to herself as the door opened and Stef walked in with a glass of water and her painkiller that they kept in their bathroom along with all the other medication including Jesus' pills.

"Hey love." Stef said affectionately as Callie tried fervently to wipe her eyes dry though she was sure that the blond had already seen the tears. "Here, this will help." Stef said as she gently forced Callie's hands away from her eyes and placed the pill into one of them.

"Thanks." Callie mumbled and swelled the bitter white pill as Stef took a seat beside her on the bed and rubbed her arm supportively.

"Lena said you were a real trouper." Stef praised.

Callie just shrugged for what could she say. The faster she got better the faster she'd be back on her own two feet - literally and she wanted to be back on top before the two women found them another home and packed them up and she didn't believe she had too much time before that happened for Stef only seemed to really care about her whenever her own children weren't around.

* * *

Callie was in a bad mood two hours later when Stef called her for lunch. The girl had finally fallen asleep once the ache in her leg had subsided and now that she'd been woken again the throbbing was beginning again. To top it off Lena had left a chicken in mushroom sauce for lunch and Callie hated mushrooms but Stef wouldn't give in and let her skip the meal.

"You have to eat Callie." Stef said firmly as Callie wanted to cry again. "I haven't even given you any of the mushrooms so quit complaining."

"Quit nagging." Callie snapped back and looked miserably up at Stef. She missed the days when the two of them would play tricks and sneak in extra desserts. Now all Stef ever did was force her to eat, hover over her like hawk and time her medications. The fun Stef was gone and Callie really missed her.

* * *

"I PASSED!" Jude yelled as he headed up the stairs the moment Lena brought the kids home from school. "I get to go to Anchor Beach from tomorrow."

"Hey." Callie smiled at her brother as he jumped onto the bed, bumping into her already aching knee. "Congratulations."

"Thanks." Jude beamed. "How was the doctors?" He asked, noticing his sister winch in pain.

"Torture." Callie admitted for the first time. "It didn't hurt as bad when Jim broke the damn thing."

"Sorry." Jude sympathized as he began to readjust himself in order to lie next to Callie.

But just then Jesus popped his head into the room. "Hey Jude, wanna come practice Mortal Kombat some more?" He asked the younger boy.

Callie could see that Jude wanted to go with Jesus but felt guilty for leaving her. The older boy had basically become a big brother to Jude, teaching him things and including him in a lot of stuff. He'd even taken Jude to the skate park a few times and once to an arcade as well in just the five days that the boy had come to live in this house.

"Go on baby." Callie encouraged with a best fake smile she could muster. "These painkillers keep me sleeping anyway." She offered and watched as Jude smiled back and quickly followed the older boy out the door and moments later she could hear the two fool around as they pretended to attack each other just the way their characters would.

As Callie lay in Mariana's room she could hear the sounds of the family around her - The two boys were playing their video game way too loud; Brandon, though using headphones, could be heard humming to his keyboard, and Callie could hear the faint voices of Stef, Lena and Mariana in the kitchen and from the few words she could actually make out it was clear that they were talking about the wedding and lying alone up in the room Callie truly felt like she didn't belong.


	4. Chapter 4

"We can do salmon tartlets, asparagus rolls, cheese and corn croquets and ham and bacon rolls. What do you think?" Mariana asked her mothers who were making dinner in the kitchen. "Also, I need your guest lists so I know how much food we need and how many guests can each of us invite?" She questioned curiously, wondering how she could invite Chase without making herself look too desperate.

"Whatever happened to burgers and hotdogs?" Stef questioned as she flipped the halibut filets that were frying in the pan. "I don't think I've ever had salmon tartlets in my life."

"Well when I looked online those were like one of the top choices for fancy appetizers and please tell me we are not going with burgers and hotdogs." She said with an attitude that had been missing from her personality ever since the shooting. "You guys are getting married; it happens only once in a lifetime." She said romantically before glancing at Stef and hiding a smirk. "With the right person." She tagged on as Stef laughed at her and shook her head.

"How much is this gonna cost us?" Stef asked her daughter skeptically. They really needed to keep this wedding as low-cost as possible for they day-to-day expenses were already high even without the two new additions that didn't come with nearly enough for all their basic needs.

"I need the number of guests for that." Mariana reminded them so the faster you get that to me the faster I can get you your quotes." She turned to leave the room but then paused and turned back. "I think each of us should be allowed to invite at least four friends." She commented, hoping that if she made it a group invite then asking Chase wouldn't seem too weird.

"You can invite your friends honey." Lena assured. Neither woman had too many people on their list and they wanted to keep the entire affair a small one but allowing the kids to have a few friends there wasn't a big deal. Stef and Lena were the ones getting married but this wedding was about the whole family and the kids were a huge part of that so it was their celebration too.

"Thanks." Mariana said contentedly. "Now I'm going to make Brandon and Jesus come to the mall with me tomorrow to buy their white formals."

* * *

Mariana walked confidently into the living room and ordered Jesus to follow her up to Brandon's room. Her twin grumbled but paused the game and promised Jude that he'd be right back before following his sister up the stairs where she was already barging into Brandon's room.

"Hey." Mariana said as she pulled his headphones off his head because he hadn't even heard her open the door. "We need to go to the mall tomorrow afternoon to buy your clothes for the wedding." She stated matter-of-factly. "White pants and a white shirt and black shoes. Moms have to pick between royal blue and dark magenta still so your bowtie will be whatever color they pick."

Mariana expected a lot of responses after she made her demands - complaints about white clothes, spending time shopping at the mall, pink bowties, bowties in general and even a formal wedding over the court marriage that their mothers originally opted for. But the response she got from her older brother truly threw her for a loop and made her realize that this wedding wasn't going to make up for almost killing her mother.

"Don't tell me what to do." Brandon ordered in response. "Moms may have forgiven you but to me you are nothing but a selfish, self-centered bitch that cares about no-one but yourself."

"Hey dickhead." Jesus defended his sister as he took a protective step in front of her. "Shut up, it was an accident. It wasn't like Mariana shot a gun at mom."

"Well she may have well have." Brandon responded with a disgusted look to his sister. "Your mother dumped you guys like garbage and my mom took you in but you still went chasing after her like she was important. Well guess what - to me, my mom is important so screw both of you."

The fact that Brandon had stated that Stef was his mom didn't go unnoticed by either twin and Mariana wondered if this was how it would always be - would she always be the rescued stray that the family took in and were now stuck with?

"I'm tell moms what you just said." Jesus threatened, determined to protect Mariana.

"Go ahead." Brandon scoffed. "They can get mad, they can make me apologize but even they can't make me forgive. The two of you can go fall back into whatever hellhole you climbed out of for all I care."

Before any more words could be said Mariana locked herself in the bathroom and slid down the length of the wall as tears poured down her face and sobs overtook her.

* * *

"Callie, you heard what the physiotherapist said." Lena told the girl who had just made her way to the bottom of the stairs by herself without the help of the crutches she was given. "You need to keep the weight off your leg until she gives you the 'okay'. You could really damage your knee like this."

"I'm fine Lena." Callie replied as she headed towards the living room, desperate to get away from all the depressing thoughts that kept plaguing her mind. At least downstairs there was activity and noise and, truth be told, usually chaos and the voices in her head were drowned out. So even if she didn't really belong to this family; even if she was just grasping at straws of attention, she still felt less alone.

"Come on, let me help you." Lena said, sounding slightly frustrated with the girl for not obeying the doctor's orders. "Why didn't you bring your crutches with you?" She questioned.

"My arms are tired." Callie admitted. "And my other leg aches too."

Lena realized just how much it must hurt for Callie to willingly admit it without even sounding ashamed. Feeling sorry for the girl she hoped to try and cheer her up. "How about you come sit with Stef and me in the kitchen while we make dinner? We're making our guest-list for the wedding, you can help us write it down."

Callie couldn't help but smile at the offer for it definitely was the best one she'd had all day. "Sure." She said and the two made their way down the steps slowly with more than half of Callie's weight on Lena.

Finally Callie heaved a sigh of relief once she was sitting on a stool. Her knee was throbbing and her other leg was so tired from taking on the extra weight but sitting across from her was Stef, chopping potatoes and giving her friendly but firm glare for not following the doctors orders but just a moment later she smiled, assuring the girl that she was welcome to spend some time downstairs with them.

"Here." Lena said, handing Callie a piece of paper and a pencil. "We'll decide who to call and you can write the names down for us."

"Sure." Callie nodded and took pencil from Lena and waited as they discussed who to add to the list.

A few minutes passed and Callie was fervently writing down the names of first the kids and then Stef and Lena's parents, Mike and a few others that were obvious attendees but just as the couple began to discuss friends and acquaintances there was argument heard from upstairs.

"Dumbass." Jesus' voice could be heard from upstairs and soon followed by Brandon's voice, drowned out by the rest of Jesus' insults and accusations.

"What now?" Lena sighed as she put down the bowl of white-sauce she was stirring to head upstairs to sort out the problem.

Callie and Stef looked at each other wondering what was happening upstairs but before Lena could have possibly reached the top of the stairs a loud crash could be heard signaling that something had obviously been thrown on the floor and had broken and Stef took that as a sign to head upstairs herself.

Once again Callie was left all alone while Stef's attentions was demanded by her real children. She sighed and shook her head as she visualized herself scratching her own name of the list that lay in front of her.


	5. Chapter 5

**Author's Note:**

I did mention this in the first story but I just wanted to remind everyone because of some of the reviews I've gotten, especially about Brandon's attitude.

Without Callie and Jude being a part of this family already, a few details from the show changed.

Brandon never followed Callie to Tijuana and therefore he made it to his audition and won which is why Stef told Callie (in the first story) he had won a $5000 scholarship (which we know from the first episode is the price money).

Stef, Lena and Mike never fight over Brandon's punishment for following Callie (since he obviously didn't follow her) and so he never nearly went to live with Mike.

Mariana never went to Wyatt's party since Callie wasn't there to introduce them. So she never got drunk or ratted out Jesus and Lexi's relationship so Lexi didn't move.

Callie also wasn't around for Kelsey to blame the pills on so she blamed Mariana and as punishment Mariana never had a Quinceanera. (First story)

Callie also wasn't around to help Brandon understand what the twins might have been thinking or feeling when they went behind Stef and Lena's backs to meet Ana and so Brandon is still angry with them which is a big part of this story. I don't generally like Brandon's character in the entire show but in this particular story his reaction is not unfounded.

* * *

"What is going on in here?" Both moms asked as they entered Brandon's room to find the two boys arguing with Brandon's bedside lamp lying broken between them.

"Nothing." Both boys said in unison for neither one was quite ready to rat the other out just in case the moms didn't see things their way. Brandon had clearly been rude to the twins and he knew that no matter what, his mothers' would not appreciate his behavior and Jesus, though confident in his mothers' love for them all wasn't sure exactly just how much they did blame him and his sister for recent events. Yes, they had said several times that neither one of them had pulled the trigger and that Stef should have also been more careful but the truth was that had it not been for the two of them then none of this would have happened at all, no matter who's fault it was.

"Well in that case both of you can be on yard duty this week." Stef said since neither son was willing to share details. "Rake up all the dead leaves, mow the lawn and pull out the weeds.

"Fine." Both boys said in unison, still glaring at each other and still more than ready to attack the moment the mothers left.

"Jesus, did you forget to take your pill today?" Lena questioned her younger son for incidents like this tended to happen when his morning pill was forgotten.

"Yes." Jesus snapped. He was tired of always being reduced to his ADHD. He was never allowed to just have a bad day or to just be angry about something without it being for a legitimate reason.

"Then maybe we need to get your dosage checked." Lena thought out loud looking at the lamp on the floor that had obviously been knocked over by the boy in question for it was nowhere near her other son.

"I'M FINE." Jesus yelled and stormed out of the room in frustration. He was so sick of being the kid with a problem for that's all that people saw. He wondered if he'd ever be anything more than that.

* * *

The following morning Brandon found himself sitting with Talya at one of the lunch tables and watching the twins. Jesus was sitting on the edge of one of the tables bouncing his leg wildly and tossing a basketball back and forth with a friend and Mariana was a few tables away with Lexi smiling as she seemed to be describing her bridesmaids dress.

"Can you believe those two?" Brandon asked in annoyance. "They act like nothing ever happened; like it was no big deal."

Talya tried, like she had been for the last fifteen minutes, to get Brandon's attention away from the twins but to no avail. "Why don't we go up to the music room and you can play something just for me?" She suggested somewhat seductively as she ran her fingers through her boyfriend's hair.

But Brandon just shook her off and stood up. "I"m not really in the mood." He dismissed and headed towards the building. "I'll see you later." He said and as an afterthought he leaned in and kissed her cheek before disappearing into the school.

* * *

Each time Jesus tossed the ball back and forth he would used just a little more force for his mind wasn't where he was physically but instead on the pill that was practically burning a hole in his pocket. He hated that whenever anything went wrong the first thing his moms assumed was his pills - or lack of them or strength or dose or anything really that involved them. Every time they would tell him that his ADHD didn't rule his life and that he was more than that but each and every time it always came down to the pills. If he had a bad day - did you take your meds; if he was unusually tired one day - maybe we need to check the dosage again; if he was excited about something - maybe we need to give some other medication a try. When would he truly be just like everyone else? Mariana was moody ninety percent of the time and they didn't constantly question her about her time of the month. Brandon free pass was the upcoming concert that he was practicing for and the moment one concert ended, he was gearing up for the next.

"Watch it dude." Jesus was dragged out of his thoughts when he almost hit his friend in the face.

"Sorry." Jesus mumbled but then got up and walked off towards his sister's table where she was sitting with his girlfriend. He was the only one he could talk to because she was the only one who truly paid any attention to him.

* * *

"I don't know if they'll like it." Mariana said as Lexi helped her plan the party. "They keep saying we need to keep it inexpensive. I think I should have just let them do the court thing."

"What are you talking about girl?" Lexi asked as she nudged Mariana. "You have been planning this so well even I'm excited about it."

"I know." Mariana agreed. "But I don't think Stef's interested in the food I picked and Lena's all stressed out about who to invite and Stef's constantly asking me how much each thing costs and I think my grams isn't happy about a backyard wedding because she and Lena keep arguing and she hadn't even come down yet. I wanted to make this special for them but I think I'm ruining it instead."

"I don't think you're ruining anything." Lexi said supportively, unaware of the real reason that her best friend was so upset. Yes she knew that the girl felt guilty but she also knew that her moms had done practically everything to show her that show as forgiven and up until yesterday Mariana had been all pumped about the party. "I just think your moms have a lot going on right now especially with Callie and Jude moving in. In fact, I think you're doing them a huge favor by taking over the party planning. All they have to really do is show up."

"Yeah but what if they hate it?" Mariana questioned as her eyes filled with tears that she tried desperately to keep from falling. "And what if they hate me?"

* * *

Once again Callie came home in tears as her leg ached from the physiotherapy. This was only the second week and she just about wanted to die. She truly felt like she was being tortured and she didn't know how much more of it she could take. As a result she was constantly in a bad mood and everyone else either avoided her or were too busy with their own things. Even Jude was always occupied with his homework, his new friend Connor or spending time with Lena whom he truly seemed to gravitate towards.

Lena was still driving Callie to and from therapy since Stef was still not yet cleared to drive and after dropping Callie back home she headed to the school to pick up the other children leaving Stef and Callie alone at home for the first time since Callie's first day with them.

"Hey baby." Stef smiled from the couch as she put down her kindle and pulled her glasses off her face to give Callie her full attention. "Come on, take a load off." She encouraged as she watched Callie make her way to the couch on her crutches, her arms and legs clearly aching.

"I hate physiotherapy." Callie complained once she was finally seated and her leg was up on the coffee table. "I'd rather just cut my leg off and be done with it."

Stef smiled sympathetically and pulled the girl towards her and began running her fingers through her hair. The two just sat in silence as Callie grabbed the remote and flipped through the channels mindlessly. This was just what she needed and she was going to relish every moment of it.


	6. Chapter 6

"So what do you think?" Mariana asked nervously as she showed her moms the menus that she'd selected. The caterer was charging thirty dollars per plate and the moms were inviting roughly sixty to seventy friends and family which was working out to two thousand dollars on food alone. Mariana had narrowed down the main dishes and brought the per-head cost down by five to seven dollars which saved them approximately five hundred dollars.

"This looks delicious honey." Lena smiled at her daughter's selection. "What do you think Stef?" She asked her wife who was going through the menu for a second time.

"I think I'm going to have trouble deciding what to eat first." She teased with a smile, approving Mariana's decision. "Everything sounds so wonderful."

"Thanks." Mariana smiled in relief. "And she agreed to twenty-five per plate, is that okay?"

"Sounds good." Stef assured and both moms noticed the undeniable relief on Mariana's face. They wondered if she just hoped they wouldn't change the menu or if planning this wedding was truly a stressful undertaking for their daughter.

"Okay great." Mariana said happily. "So I'll confirm it with the caterer right now because we're already running short on time. The wedding is just over a month away and I still have to book the flowers and get the invitations printed and I have to get our outfits.

"Actually honey, about that." Stef stopped her, glancing towards Lena for one last approval on the decision they had made before sharing it with their little wedding planner. "We were thinking that instead of having the wedding next month we thought we'd wait until the summer."

"Is something wrong?" Mariana asked worriedly. She wondered if maybe her moms didn't really like what she'd planned or were hoping that with time she'd lose interest in planning their wedding. "Did you not like something?"

"No baby." Stef assured, somewhat disheartened that Mariana was still so insecure sometimes. "This has nothing to do with you. You're doing a fantastic job of planning this wedding and I'm sure you will do a fantastic job of it a few months from now." She stated, patting Mariana gently on the back.

"Actually honey, we're thinking of postponing it because of Callie." Lena explained. "Her physiotherapy is so intense right now and she's constantly in pain and we want everyone to enjoy the wedding and the party. Right now she's barely able to even walk because she's in so much pain."

"You think that would be okay?" Stef asked, hoping that Mariana would agree with them now that she knew their reasoning.

"Oh, yeah." Mariana said, relieved that it wasn't because of something she did. "It makes sense. I'll just keep what I have and keep working on it so that it'll be perfect for when it actually happens." She said with a smile.

"Sounds good." Stef agreed before sending the Latina off and turning to her wife. "She still takes everything so personally." Stef complained.

"She still feels guilty." Lena observed. "She knows we love and forgave her in her head but in her heart she blames herself and so she's projecting. Things will get better with time and once you go back to work and things go back to normal I think she will too."

"I sure hope you're right." Stef said, glancing up the stairs the way her daughter had gone wondering what exactly kept going through the girl's head each time she retreated into her shell.

* * *

Jesus had watched his sister try desperately to make his moms wedding special and hopefully make amends for her mistakes and it both hurt and angered him to see that Brandon's words had truly stung Mariana and so he hoped to try extra hard to cheer her up and helping with the wedding seemed like the perfect way to do that.

"So when are we going for those wedding clothes?" He asked Mariana at the dinner table that evening as the whole family sat down to a delicious meal of baked creamed corn and spinach. "I promise to wear whatever you pick out." He added.

Everyone was talking to each other about various things while Callie sat and fidgeted with her food like she seemed to do almost all the time, especially the meal after physiotherapy when her leg ached the most. She wasn't participating in the conversations and she wasn't really paying attention to them either but she could hear some of it in the back of her mind.

"There's no hurry." Mariana said with a shrug. "The wedding's not happening until the fall." She explained.

"What? Why?" Brandon asked suddenly, worried that his attack on Mariana had caused the change. He wasn't sorry for what he said; he firmly believed what he said but he still wanted his moms to have a wonderful wedding and Mariana was doing a great job of it even if he didn't think it was enough to make up for almost killing his mother.

"Callie." Mariana responded in just one word.

At this Callie's head snapped up for that was definitely the very last thing she expected to hear. "Me?" She asked in utter disbelief. "What did I do?"

"You didn't do anything honey." Lena quickly assured.

Stef shook her head and sighed - was it just her imagination or were these kids taking everything very personally lately? - she wondered to herself. "We just thought that right now, with your leg hurting so much from physiotherapy that we'd postpone the wedding until you can enjoy it as well." Stef explained.

"What does that have to do with anything?" Callie asked in irritation.

"Honey, you can barely walk right now and you're in so much pain most of the day that we didn't really feel like celebrating." Stef answered her.

"Well you're not celebrating me so who cares. It's your wedding so can you please leave me the fuck out of it." Callie yelled angrily as she got up off the stool as fast as she possibly could in order to leave the table and the room.

"Hey!" Stef called out, standing up as well as she blocked Callie's exit. "Sit back down young lady." Stef warns sternly, standing ram-rod straight in front of the younger girl.

Callie felt like crying as she once again craved the Stef from the hospital who sneaked her treats and played tricks on the nurses in order to cheer her up. Now all she ever seemed to do was yell at her or forget about her entirely. But with nothing left but to obey, Callie sat back down in her chair and refused to look Stef in the eye while the rest of the table looked on with curiosity.

"If you try to leave a room in a huff one more time I will cuff you to your chair every time you sit down." Stef warned with such seriousness that Callie wondered if she was joking or actually telling the truth. "Each time something doesn't go your way you just walk off and I'll be damned if I let that behavior continue. Now what are you so mad about?" She questioned, wondering why the girl was so upset about a change in their wedding date.

"It's your fucking wedding, not mine." Callie responded with a lower level of defiance. It was clear that Stef was having an effect on her.

"So what?" Stef questioned, still stiff as a rod, choosing to ignore the swearing for the moment and focus on the argument at hand.

"So why do you have to switch the date for me?" Callie argued irritably.

"Because we want our kids to be a part of it and enjoy it too." Stef replied in a tone that made it clear that it was just an obvious reason.

"I'm not your kid." Callie responded taking Stef by surprise for she definitely didn't expect that statement from the girl simply because she'd already begun seeing Callie as one of her own long before the girl even came to live with them.

"Our biological kids, our adopted kids, our foster kids. The common factor here is _our kids_ and you fall under that so get used to it." She said in frustration, hating just how little Callie thought of herself. But then she softened and sat down on the stool next to Callie. "We don't mind waiting honey." She said gently. "We waited for my back to heal."

"IT'S YOUR FUCKING WEDDING!" Callie yelled in frustration.

"Enough with the swearing." Stef said in a warning tone. "And so what if it is our wedding? Is it so bad that we want our family and friends to have a good time?"

"Not if it means changing the fucking date for someone just passing through." Callie replied.

"CALLIE!" Stef warned angrily.

Callie sighed and looked down, she wasn't going to win this and there was just no point in arguing any further. "Sorry." She mumbled almost inaudibly.

"What's going on baby?" Stef softened her voice as well. Something was obviously bothering Callie and it couldn't just be the fact that they chose a different wedding date. "What are you thinking?"

Callie looked up at Stef though her head was still tilted downwards and the sincerity on Stef's face made Callie open up. "You really care about me enough to change your fuc…" She paused and stopped herself just in time. "…wedding day?" She confirmed.

"Yes." Stef answered with no faltering.

"What about your budget?" Callie asked, knowing that certain things had already been arranged like a professional gardening service to plant some more flowers look after the back yard in order to keep it looking nice for the big day.

"We can handle this." Stef assured, raising Callie's chain with her finger. "It's really not that big of a deal."

Callie looked away in shame, uncomfortable with the gesture and annoyed that she actually wanted them to care enough to do this for her. Every so often the Stef from the hospital would make an appearance and that only reminded Callie of how short-lived this situation was going to be - the woman would once again get distracted by her wife and three kids and eventually Callie and Jude would be off to another home once Bill found a suitable one for them.


	7. Chapter 7

"Cool!" Jude grinned as he watched the ball that he'd just hit roll along the grass. It was his first hit after about twenty tries. Jesus was teaching him to play baseball so that Jude wouldn't be totally clueless when he went to the batting cages with his new friend Conner over the weekend.

"Great Jude." Jesus praised. He had taken an exceptional liking to Jude and took pride in playing the big brother. He felt a sense of responsibility towards the younger boy that wasn't burdened with protecting or defending the way that it had been with Mariana when they were growing up. Even now, though circumstances were completely different, Jesus still felt an internal need to protect Mariana whether she was in the right or not. Jude, on the other hand, was just an innocent young boy that admired Jesus for his sporty ability and all that he had to teach and Jesus felt proud to be in idol for him.

"Can I try it again?" Jude asked, his eyes shining with excitement, eager to see if it was just a fluke or was he really getting the hang of this.

"Of course." Jesus nodded. "Practice makes perfect." He waited for Jude to get into position before gently tossing the ball towards him and both their faces lit up as the bat made contact with the ball - much harder than the last time.

* * *

An hour later the boys headed into the kitchen for some water; both of them sweaty, dirty and panting but both of them smiling and having fun.

"I like this house." Jude commented casually to Jesus as the older boy pulled two glasses off the shelf. "I've never been in a house where someone can cause such an accident and still be forgiven." He said casually.

Jesus was just about to fill up the first glass when Jude made his comment and he stopped straight in his tracks. He pictured the previous homes that Jude and Callie must have been in and it wasn't hard to imagine getting punished for talking too loudly or accidentally breaking something. It wasn't too hard because he and Mariana had been in homes like that a few times too. But what really got to him was what Jude said about this house - he was free to make mistakes and knew that he would be forgiven but the trouble was he wasn't forgetting his pills- he was skipping them on purposed that wasn't really fair to his moms who were trying everything in their power to help him with his ADHD. They had been nothing but supportive from the moment they found out about it unlike most other foster homes where he was packing before he even had a change to unpack.

With a surrendering sigh he took his glass and headed towards his medication quickly taking one; completely tuning Jude out even though the young boy was still talking.

* * *

"O.M.G. How cute is this?" Mariana asked holding up her phone so that her moms could see the image on the screen.

"Pick a seat not a side - either way it's for a bride." Stef read out loud as she glanced to Lena amused. The idea was nice and as long as Lena and Mariana were happy then she was happy too.

"You guys have already been together forever so all the guests are pretty much gonna be from both sides - I thought this fit." Mariana explained.

"True." Lena agreed as she handed the phone back, tying her wild curls up on top of her head as she cuddled close to Stef.

Stef thought that the idea was nice and as long as Lena and Mariana were happy then she was happy too.

"I'm actually kind of glad we postponed the wedding." Mariana admitted. "I found this site with ideas for lesbian weddings and they have some great ideas that we can now incorporate." Mariana continued. "One person had a rainbow themed wedding," She paused here. "Like rainbow pride." She explained as though her moms wouldn't have realized the significance of a rainbow themed same-sex wedding. "So I was thinking that we could do like this frosted white ceremony and convert to a rainbow theme for the reception." She said.

"Convert?" Stef asked skeptically, wondering what that meant exactly.

"Well…" Mariana began. "I was thinking that you two could wear white dresses and all of us can wear white too; a sleeveless dresses for us girls and white shirts and pants for the boys. Then once the ceremony is over Callie and I can put bright colored shrugs over the dress and the boys can have colored waistcoats. Your cake can be rainbow colored from the inside but covered in elegant white fondant so it only shows when it's cut and instead of rice for the guests to throw we can give them party poppers filled with rainbow confetti."

"Wow honey, you've really given this some thought." Lena observed.

"I just want to make this perfect for you guys." Mariana admitted. "Besides, it's kinda fun. I just wish we had a bigger budget though."

And there it was - the two sides to the new Mariana. In one breath she had once again displayed her guilt and desperate need to make amends and voiced her usually sassy side by complaining that what she had just wasn't enough.

* * *

A few weeks later, a Saturday, Stef had her doctor's appointment to see if she was cleared for more tasks such as driving, working out and eventually heading back to work and Lena was going with her. Mariana was dragging Jesus to the mall to look for clothes for the wedding to match the theme she had in mind. Neither mom had rejected her idea of going from white to rainbow but she wasn't entirely convinced that they actually liked it either and so she was still keeping her options open.

Callie sat in the living room with Jude watching as everyone got ready to leave. Mariana was yelling for Jesus who was still upstairs, probably procrastinating causing Lena to chastise her for yelling in the house as she double-checked that they had Stef's medical file and Stef was making sure that Callie and Jude had everything they needed to be alone for a few hours and that the twins would be home by dinner time. With one final wave the two moms left and Mariana immediately yelled once again for Jesus, threatening that if he didn't get going right now then she'd pick a hot pink for his color and force him to wear it.

Jesus finally came bounding down the stairs. "I'd like to see you force me to do anything." Jesus challenged. He didn't think Mariana had the strength to move even his little finger if he didn't want her to.

Just as Mariana was grabbing her bag from the couch Jesus turned to Jude. "Dude, there's no way Mariana is gonna be done in an hour like she promised, you wanna tag along? We could go hang out at the arcade while she shops and you can practice your batting."

Jude's eyes immediately lit up, the pride at being once again invited to join Jesus clear on his little face. "Yeah!" He said immediately. He got up and bolted up the stairs to get his shoes, determined to be quick so as not to delay Mariana any further. The fact that he was ditching Callie without even consulting her about it never once crossed his mind and it clearly didn't cross the twins' either for not one of them so much as glanced towards her as they left.

Just moments later the house was far too quiet for Callie as she made her way to the kitchen for a snack. Her leg still ached but she had to admit she was doing a lot better since she started her physiotherapy. She found some salt and vinegar chips and then headed back to the living room to watch something on TV - basically the only thing she'd been doing ever since physiotherapy had begun a month ago. When Jesus had first asked Jude if he wanted to tag along to the mall Callie had expected the younger boy to decline since the house would be totally empty except for the Jacob siblings and Callie and Jude had hardly spent any time together since she was always stuck at home and there was always so much activity around the house. But the younger boy obviously liked having a big brotherly figure and for the first time in a long time Jude was in a house where he could just be a kid and he was obviously taking full advantage of it. It made Callie wonder what would happen to both of them once they moved on and a very small part of her hoped that it would happen soon for as nice and safe as this home was it was clear that this Stef wasn't ever going to be the same one from back at the hospital and she was never going to be as important to the woman as she'd been back then and to top it all off they seemed to have taken Jude from her - the only thing that she truly had.


	8. Chapter 8

Two and a half hours later the twins and Jude came back. Mariana was talking animatedly about all the stuff she had seen and tentatively picked out - both, for the wedding and well as for herself. Jesus looked exhausted and more than happy to be back home but Jude looked just as excited as Mariana, even agreeing with her on some of the items she was still talking about. Callie smiled at his excitement, feeling glad that at least he will be able to attend this wedding and see it happen even if he won't be a part of the ceremony.

"So what do you think?" Mariana asked Callie who have obviously tuned the younger girl out. "White tuxes with colored waistcoats or just shirts and pants with colored ties?"

Callie was completely surprised as she stared blankly at the girl as though she'd asked her to sing a song in Chinese or something. "You're asking me?" She asked in surprise. "Why?" She added nervously.

"Because you don't get fashion advice from straight guys." Mariana said matter-of-factly as she looked towards the boys in the room. "I want it to look nice but I'm thinking tuxes might be a bit over the top, especially since Stef wants to wear pants instead of a dress. I don't want the boys to overshadow her. Even if they don't choose the rainbow theme, a tux might be a bit much."

"Just shirt and ties sounds good." Callie offered uncertainly. "I mean, it is a backyard wedding and like you said, Stef and Lena are the ones who need to stand out."

"Right?" Mariana smiled, feeling more relaxed now that even Callie agreed with her idea.

As the four of them continued to talk about other ideas and suggestions Brandon walked in the door, back from his afternoon with Talya.

"You have to pick which color tie you want to wear for the wedding." Jude quickly said, bursting with excitement. "You have to choose between red, blue and indigo."

"I already said I wanted blue." Jesus piped up. "There's no way I'm getting stuck with purple or red. He can pick from either of those colors."

"I still need moms to approve the rainbow theme." Mariana reminded both Jude and Jesus. "I'm not totally sure if they want to do it or just stick with the white and silver."

"You think they'll care?" Brandon asked snidely. "They're doing all of this for you. But of course once again you're too selfish to notice."

"What do you mean?" Mariana asked confused. "I'm doing this for them. I want them to have a special day and celebrate and they were just going down to city hall to have it registered." She defended.

"No, you're not." Brandon argued. "You're doing it so that you can feel less guilty and they are letting you because of that. Moms would be totally fine with city hall." He said venomously. "It's like you don't even know them." He shook his head in disgust. "They don't need all this crap. They just need each other and the people that they love and whatever reason, you're one of them. You really think that a cake filled with white or rainbow or all the freakin' stars in the sky is gonna make a difference to them? They aren't sure about your stupid _theme_ because they don't really want it but it's clear as day that you do and they don't want to hurt your feelings or you'll once again go down you're 'poor me, I need constant reassurance that I'm forgiven and still loved' road." He ended in a mocking, dramatic voice. He finally scoffed. "I can't believe it - you treat them like crap; like they are just substitutes or something and then when it all goes south for you and your _real mom_ they still treat you like you're the freaking center of the world."

By now everyone was standing shellshocked as Brandon disappeared out the front door the way he had come, desperate to get away of the two kids he was forced to call his siblings. No one knew what to say and truth be told - Brandon's words held some weight and now that Mariana thought about it she realized that he was probably right. But it was the way that Brandon said it and the fact that he was trying to hurt her that made her finally burst into tears and race up the stairs to the safety of her bedroom.

She tried to figure out what the best thing to do would be - was she really just doing all this for herself? Wouldn't her moms appreciate their love being celebrated? Shouldn't they get to really celebrate their special day? Or was she really forcing this on them? Should she just give up and let them do things their own way? But the one question that was plaguing her more than any other was _would things ever go back to the way they used to be?_

* * *

By the time Stef and Lena got back from the doctors and a quick trip to their favorite Mexican restaurant for take out to celebrate Stef's _all clear_ , Brandon was back home and at his piano, Mariana was finishing up some homework, Jesus and Jude were out back practicing again for no other reason than to avoid the tension inside the house and Callie was still sitting on the couch trying to make sense of everything that was going on in her own life and around her.

"Dinner!" Stef called out from the bottom of the stairs when she entered the house before heading into the living room to give Callie a quick kiss on the head and ask her how she was feeling. "Come and get it kid." She said lovingly. "Castillo's is the best Mexican food in town."

Ten minutes later the seven of them were sitting around the dinner table eating fajitas, tamales, tacos and quesadillas while Stef and Lena were sharing the various tests that Stef had to do that day. "And finally after all ten-thousand of them were over, he said I was cleared to resume normal life." Stef finished happily.

"Mom didn't even wait half a second before she snatched the car keys out of my hands." Lena added mischievously although that is exactly how the incident had taken place. "I don't think I'm going to get a chance to drive for the rest of the year at least."

"Tease all you want but I am so done with being an invalid." Stef shrugged. "Now if anyone so much as suggests that something is too heavy or hard for me I kid you not I will run you over with the car." She said sternly, widening her eyes in warning.

Dinner continued as the conversation consisted largely about all the things that Stef could finally do once again and how life was finally going to be totally normal now that she could also go back to work. But it didn't last long for the very next night, at the dinner table the mood was completely subdued as everyone realized that the following morning Stef would be back at the station with her badge and gun where this could so very easily all happen again.


	9. Chapter 9

"Are you scared?" Mariana asked her mother as everyone sat at the dinner table on Sunday night.

The entire table stopped eating and watched Stef for they all wondered the same thing.

"I'm no, are you?" Stef asked back, wondering what this was doing to her already insecure and guilt ridden daughter.

"A little." Mariana admitted honestly.

"Couldn't you get like, a desk job or something?" Jude asked innocently as he watched all three of the Foster kids looking so grim.

Stef laughed and glanced at a wife who she knew would love for her to do just that - but they all knew that it wasn't who she was and it wouldn't be fair to ask her to be anyone but herself. "This is who I am sweetheart." She answered the young boy. "I am very well trained and I have protection and I know that I wasn't wearing my vest that night but the situation was different. I wasn't acting like a cop that night, I was a mother and I thought that my son was in danger." She paused to look at Jesus, remembering just how afraid she'd been about what state she would find him. "When I'm on the job I am much more rational and prepared and… I've learned from my mistakes." She continued. "I know now that no matter how important a situation, I have to be prepared because I'm no use to anyone if I'm shot or injured or, or dead."

"But it could still happen right?" Mariana questioned. "I mean, cops get shot all the time."

"Yes, it's true that my job is on the dangerous side but that's why we are so well trained and we are given vests and gear to protect us, we have backup and support from our co-workers and we have rules and protocols that we have to follow in order to keep ourselves, each other and everyone safe."

"Honey, we can't live in constant fear of what might happen." Lena answered her daughter and the table at large. "Fear paralyzes us and keeps us from enjoying life. The truth is that anything could happen to any one of us. We could have a heart attack or be at the bank when someone walks in with a gun or there could be a car accident simply because your brakes failed. Anything can happen at any time but that doesn't mean we're all just going to sit at home wrapped in bubble does it?"

Everyone shook their heads as Stef watched Callie, thinking of how her world had turned upside down in just such an accident. It made her realize just how much life could have changed for her own family all because she'd been reckless. Yes, it was her son in there and he could have been in danger but rushing into that house the way that she did would have done him no good either if she ended up lying dead on the floor.

"I am so, so sorry for what I put all of you through." Stef finally said. "I know that, for a while at least, it's going to be tough watching me go to work every morning but I want you know that I promise never to be so rash and impulsive again. I know I was in a hurry to get to Jesus and nothing was going to stop me but it wasn't my job to get him that day. Not as a cop at least." Stef continued. "I wasn't acting like a cop, I was acting as a mother, It's like with doctors and why they aren't supposed to perform surgeries on their own family and close friends or why judges aren't allowed to try cases involving people they know because their judgement is clouded and they don't always make the best decisions. I should have waited and called for backup but my judgement was way off. You guys are the most important thing to me and I don't want to miss out on watching you grow up into the wonderful people you are meant to be."

As Stef talked Callie could understand just how everyone felt - if she had known, even at ten, what was to happen to her mother while she was just sitting in a car she would have been terrified every time her mother so much as went onto the road. These kids had gotten a glimpse of the horrors of their mothers job and now they wanted to just keep her home and keep her safe - it wasn't as ludicrous an idea as Stef made it seem.

"But please, always, always, remember that I love each of you and nothing anyone can ever do will change that. You are my babies and even when I'm dead and gone, know that I love you with all of my heart." She finished, focused solely on Brandon and the twins; trying with all her power to convey just how true and how powerful her words and feelings were.

* * *

Eventually, after a dinner much longer than most, everyone headed up to their rooms to get ready for bed. Callie knew that Stef and Lena would be up in a bit to say goodnight and knowing Stef, she'd make sure to remind all of her kids that they were loved and not to be scared despite having just had an hourlong conversation on that very subject. But even that would be a while for the dishes still had to be done and the moms didn't ask the kids for help because it was already late on a school night.

But as Callie crawled into bed, more than glad to finally rest her aching leg she watched Mariana get ready for bed herself. The usually perky and perfect foster sister was less than focused today. The girl was brushing her hair but where she usually made sure to brush it out well without missing any part of it, she seemed to be focused on something far away, the brush making its way through the left side of her head for well over forty strokes by now.

"She really does love you, you know." Callie said, breaking the silence, and hopefully Marianas fearful thoughts. "She would tell me everyday just how much she loved you and your brothers; especially after you would leave from visiting."

"I know." Mariana answers, putting down her brush and turning to look at Callie. "But that just makes it worse, like Brandon said - they love me so much and I went behind their backs and nearly cost Stef her life."

"I get where he's coming from but he's wrong." Callie added her two cents. "He's scared and hurt and he's mad at you guys but that doesn't change the fact that you are their family and your moms love you just as much as ever. People can die at anytime from anything but I know that my mom loved me despite all our fights and all my bad behavior and knowing that means the world to me."

"But that doesn't make it any less scary." Mariana replied. "I mean, I always knew that her job was dangerous and things like this could happen but you never expect it to happen to you. It's alway something you hear about on the news or see in a movie."

"I know what you mean." Callie agreed. "My mom went out on night for dinner with my dad and some friends and she never came home. I woke up the next morning and I didn't even have a family anymore."

"We're like your family." Mariana offered kindly, actually liking Callie for the very first time and seeing her as someone dealt a terrible hand just like she herself had been. The girl was no longer just a roommate she was forced to allow into her room.

"It isn't the same." Callie said sadly. It wasn't that she didn't appreciate the offer but a temporary family that wasn't even really hers just didn't cut it now matter how much it was exactly what she wanted. "This is definitely the best house that we've ever lived in and the fact that Jude and I are here together means more than anything but it's still temporary." She said with a shrug. "It's like I can catch my breath for a while but we never know how long it will last or what the next house will be like. Some of the houses we've been in are worse than nightmares." She admitted for the first time besides to Stef.

"What were they like?" Mariana asked curiously. She remembered being in some less that appropriate homes but they'd been rescued so early on that they were lucky enough to have skipped the really horrific ones.

Callie shrugged, wondering where to even begin. "Our first house was actually a really nice one. The Segals." She relayed. "I screwed that up." She added with a miserable shake of her head as the other girl listened with interest. "They took us back to our house to get some of our things and I was just standing in the middle of the room trying to decided what I wanted to take with me, or rather what I could bare to leave behind and then I just lost it; I starting flinging everything everywhere until my room was one royal mess. I broke the furniture and shattered the mirror and somehow I even managed to wreck my pillow. They sent us back the next day saying that they couldn't handle such a traumatized child who obviously needed a lot of help. After that we never got a good home again. We had foster parents who wouldn't feed us or made us do all kids of chores from morning to night. The foster father who landed me in the hospital shattered my knee with a baseball bat."

"Really?" Mariana asked, her eyes wide in surprise.

"Yup." Callie answered with a shrug. "He shattered my knee, broke my arm in several places, cracked my ribs and knocked a tooth out when he hit me on my face. All because I was trying to stop him from beating up Jude for trying on a dress."

"Man." Mariana said sadly. "I can't believe people like that even get to have foster kids."

Once again Callie shrugged for she had absolutely no idea. All she knew was that if there was bad luck anywhere then she seemed to have a gift for finding it and even here, in this house, she knew that it would eventually come looking for her.

"When mom first got shot mama had me talk to the school counselor for a while and she said that she believed that everything happens for a reason and that something good comes out of every situation." Mariana explained. "I'm not using it as an excuse or anything but if mom wasn't in that hospital then she would never have met you." She offered.

"That was good for me." Callie admitted. "But she could still have done without being shot." She said.

"You could both have been done without being in that hospital but it wasn't just good for you to have her there. You kept her sane too. Stef _loves_ to take care of people and she absolutely hates being seen as incapable or weak. You gave her something to care for and that was something that she really needed." Mariana said wisely.

Callie thought about what Mariana had said and she realized that there must have been truth to her words for Stef had truly become like a parent to her - she'd taken care of her and corrected her when she was wrong; lended a shoulder for her to cry on and celebrated with her whenever she had some good news. Stef had been everything to her in that hospital and she'd wanted nothing more than to come back home with Stef and be a part of her family but now that she was back home with her own kids Callie wasn't needed anymore. Stef had been only hers for those weeks they were alone but now she was the very last thing on Stef's mind.


	10. Chapter 10

Stef, by this time, had already been to Brandon's room and stopped in at Jesus and Jude's room and was just making her way to her girls when she heard them talking. It was Mariana's statement about her caring for others and not liking being vulnerable that caused her to pause for a moment and listen and she was glad that she did for while she wasn't one to eves-drop or snoop, this did give her a little bit of insight into what her girls where thinking and feeling; something that she desperately needed to know in order to help them.

"You're part of this family too you know." Mariana continued. She may have been selfish and insecure but she wasn't stupid. It was clear as day how Callie felt and Mariana could understand it because she'd felt that very same way before she came to live with Stef and Lena. "Moms would never exclude you from this wedding, that's why they wanted to postpone it to a time when you weren't hurting so bad."

Callie still remained silent as Stef listened at the door, hoping to get a bit more information and hopefully a clue about how to help them. She hated what previous foster parents, the system and life in general had done to her kids but both girls seemed to have been affected much more than her boys.

"They don't treat us any different than they do Brandon." Mariana pointed out. "Even after everything I've done, and even though Brandon can't seem to forgive me for it, moms don't treat me any different."

This was news to Stef for while she knew that Brandon was scared and angry, she thought that they had dealt with it already. She hadn't seen any changes in his behavior around the twins. Her focus, momentarily drifted until Callie's response brought her back.

"You're adopted." Callie replied softly.

"We weren't when we first got here." Mariana pointed out. "Trust me, It took me foreverto trust them but never once did they make us feel like we weren't worth just as much as Brandon was. It's like you said, he's mad because I nearly got his mom killed and he's even more annoyed that they still love me in spite of it. But if I had been their biological daughter and done something that nearly got Stef killed then he would have been just as mad and they would have loved me just as much."

Stef felt her eyes fill with tears. It warmed her heart to hear that her daughter obviously didn't doubt their love. Clearly there were more hurdles to cross like Brandon's apparent anger and Mariana's ongoing guilt but at least the girl knew that she still belonged and was still loved and, to Stef, that was the biggest hurdle crossed.

"Still, as nice as this house is, it's not easy to just relax when you never know when it's going to end." Callie answered, still feeling like she didn't belong and that any moment it would all just disappear.

"I get that." Mariana said understandingly. "Your mom died in an accident, one that could technically have been avoided but it was an accident and no one meant for anything bad to happen. My mom is alive and evil and she abandoned us for drugs and after eight years she finally gets to meet me again and all she really wanted was an ATM machine."

"She told me about that." Callie raid without thinking before it struck her that the younger girl may not like that she knew these things without her permission. "She wasn't being mean or complaining or anything." She quickly added so that Mariana wouldn't feel betrayed. "She was just trying to show me that no one's life is perfect no matter how it looks to people on the outside."

"She talked a lot about you too." Mariana told Callie, trying to show that girl that she did mean a lot to Stef and wasn't just a filler while she was stuck in the hospital. "She didn't tell us anything personal but it was pretty obvious that you were important to her." She added, trying to ease Callie's worries in the same way that Callie had tried to ease hers.

Callie didn't respond for while the image Mariana painted was comforting, the words she used seemed pretty accurate for it was true that she had been important to Stef, back when Stef was alone in the hospital with no one she loved around.

Once it seemed clear that the conversation was over Stef knocked on the door and entered in order to say goodnight to the two girls, making a mental note to talk to each one privately in order to address their concerns.

* * *

Breakfast the next morning was just as chaotic and noisy as any other day. Callie made her way downstairs on her crutches to find Lena with all three boys. She knew that Mariana was still upstairs getting her shoes on but the girl won't be more than a few more minutes.

"Good morning honey." Lena smiled at Callie as she set some fruit down in front of the girl. "You sure you're okay to be on your own today?" She questioned. They had already talked to her the day before and Stef was only going to be gone half the day for the first week but still, Lena felt a little unsettled leaving Callie all by herself when she wasn't moving around so easily yet.

"I'll be fine." Callie assured. "It doesn't hurt as much anymore and…"

But she was cut off as Stef made her way downstairs to the kitchen. Callie's jaw practically dropped as she saw Stef in full uniform for the very first time ever. It was one thing to know that Stef was a cop but to actually see her in the uniform made her shiver for she had absolutely no pleasant counters with the police in the past. After a moment Callie realized that the rest of the room had gone quite as well and as she glanced around she could see the nervousness on everyone's faces. They liked having Stef home and safe everyday and now that she was going back to work, the dangers of her job were resurfacing.

"Mariana still not down yet?" Stef asked no one in particular as she lovingly stroked her hand through Brandon's hair as she passed by him.

"MARIANA!" Lena called up the stairs and just a moment later they heard the thumping of wedges on the wooden stairs.

"I'm coming." Mariana called as she descended the steps in a hurry. "There's no need to yell, I'm not d…" She began but stopped when she saw her mom back in her uniform again.

Mariana's entire demeanor changed and her shoulders slumped as she walked the last couple of steps to the table and grabbed a banana.

"It's going to be okay sweetheart." Stef assured her daughter and the other kids in general. "It's just half day and I promise I'll be careful. You guys text me whenever you want okay." She offered, hoping to ease their minds.

Mariana nodded in resignation just as the doorbell rang. Brandon got up to answer it and a moment later he returned with his dad in tow.

"Ready Stef?" Mike questioned. "You don't wanna be late on your first day back." He would never admit it to his ex-wife but he was so glad that she was getting back to work for it meant that she was truly on the mend. He felt so guilty for her being shot and there was absolutely nothing he could do about it despite standing less than five steps away at the time.

"Just a minute." Stef said before turning back to her family. "It's gonna be okay." She promised. "I'll see you all when you get home from school."

After a quick kiss to her wife and a last 'I love you' to her kids, Stef was out the door with Mike who had insisted on driving her her first day back. Stef didn't turn around as she left for she couldn't bare to see the sad faces of her family as they watched her walk away to a job that, someday, could very truly cost her her life.


	11. Chapter 11

"Where is everyone?" Mariana asked her mother as she came down the stairs on Friday evening after a shower.

"Brandon's at his dad's tonight and Mama's picking Callie up from therapy and she took Jude and Jesus with her as well. They're gonna pick up some takeout on their way back."

"Oh." Mariana said, a little surprised that everyone was gone but her. No one asked her if she wanted to go with them.

"Come sit." Stef requested, patting the spot next to her on the couch when she saw the disappointment in her daughter's face. "It's not so bad hanging out with your old mom is it?" She teased.

"No." Mariana smiled. "There's hardly ever alone time, especially now with Callie and Jude." Mariana admitted. "It's kinda nice."

"Um." Stef agreed, realizing that her daughter was right - no one in the house ever got any personal time for more than a few minutes simply because someone else was always coming or going or needed attention as well. It was hard enough with three children - and now with five; one of whom still required a lot of physical help and support. But not once did any of her kids complain. They welcomed the two Jacob children in with open arms.

"I'm so proud of you, you know that." Stef finally broken the silence that had fallen between them. Stef had been glad when Lena had to leave and Mariana had just started her shower. She managed to convince Lena into getting take-out as a treat for the night and after that it didn't take much to get the boys to go along to help choose and carry and now she had a bit of time alone with Mariana - something she had wanted ever since she overheard the two girls talking.

Mariana looked at Stef, wondering where this was going. These little reassurance talks had happened fairly frequently ever since the shooting and Mariana was getting used to them but they usually came after Mariana said or did something that she wouldn't usually have done. But this, today seemed to be out of the blue.

"Have you ever felt like you didn't belong in this family?" Stef questioned curiously. "Have you ever felt like an outsider?

Mariana shrugged for she wasn't sure what to say. She wasn't even entirely sure what Stef meant. She remembered feeling hurt when Lena couldn't even look at her after the shooting but she didn't feel like an outsider; more like a betrayer.

"I'm talking about before the shooting and all this. Once you came to live with us and became a part of us, did you ever feel like you didn't belong?"

"No." Mariana answered honestly. None of them had ever made the twins feel like they didn't belong, right from the moment they walked through the door.

"You sure?" Stef asked for confirmation. She didn't want Mariana to tell her what she wanted to hear but what she was actually feeling.

"Not once." Mariana assured. "You guy's have always been so welcoming."

Stef smiled, glad that their efforts hadn't been in vain. They had had so many doubts back when they first decided to foster and tried to get their hands on the twins that Stef had first met at work - how would they manage three children; two of whom would come with a handful of troubles for they were definitely not going to be unscathed by their experiences. Could they be all that they needed to be in order to help them? Could they all learn to love each other even though they weren't all technically a family? Would Brandon suffer from bringing two new kids into their home without the usual nine-month adjustment period most families had when they welcomed new children? Would Stef and Lena manage to get through it all without losing themselves in the process? And just about a million other doubts and worries that such a major decision came with.

"We loved you." Stef said easily. "The parental love may have come a little later but we cared for you right from the start."

"I get that." Mariana said. "I mean, I didn't see you guys as my moms right away." She admitted with a shrug. "Actually, I'm not really sure when I really thought of you as my moms." She added retrospectively. "It just kind of happened gradually."

"It was like that for us too." Stef admitted truthfully. "We were to foster you; nothing more. In the beginning you weren't even up for adoption so we never really even considered it but then as time passed, we couldn't picture our lives without you and when we thought of the future, you two were always there. It's like our hearts had adopted you long before our heads did."

Mariana smiled. It made complete sense for often, our hearts rule us and our heads have no choice but to follow.

"Making things official was a little harder." Stef continued, giving words to thoughts and feelings for the very first time, especially in front of one of the children. "Apart from the obvious facts that you weren't technically up for adoption since your mother claimed she wanted you back but just the finality of it was a little… daunting." She finished, for want of a clearer word. "Changes had happened so quickly for all of us - Lena never had a child before and then in less than two years she was suddenly the mother of three. I had changed my entire life and while it was for the better, it wasn't always easy and Brandon was still pretty young so I was always afraid of how my choices would affect him."

Stef looked at Mariana then, hoping that her honesty hadn't hurt the young girl. Her motive was to show the girl that not everything just magically work out at the first try and that was okay - sometimes it took a little work; a little bravery; a little trust, before it all fell into place.

"For mama, it was the thought of a child needing her so desperately." Stef continued when she was met with curious, interested eyes. "She had always been a great teacher but being a mother was new to her and jumping right in, and missing the baby years, made her nervous. For me it was all the changes in my life. I got divorced, came out, started a new relationship, tried to build a new life for Brandon that now involved an extra parent. My father was still very vocal about his disapproval of my choices and that still weighed very heavily on my heart, especially at the time and I wondered if I was doing the wrong thing, and would I be dragging all three of you kids down with me. How would all of you truly feel, being deprived of a father and having two mothers instead?" She asked rhetorically.

But Mariana had an actual answer, one that Stef could definitely had used back in those early days. "I loved it." Mariana said easily. "I guess, back then, I didn't think of it as two moms and no dad - I was just happy to have a safe place but it all just seemed to fit. You and mama were unlike any other couple I'd ever met. It's not that you never argued or disagreed or anything but just that you respected each other despite your differences. I think that's what made me feel the most comfortable here - that you guys could be on opposite sides without deliberately trying to hurt each other." Mariana scooted down on the couch a bit and rested her head against her mother's shoulder. "I love having two moms." She said softly. "I love having _you two_ as my moms." She finished.

Stef smiled as she rested her head against her daughter's, smelling the peach shampoo that still lingered in the now only slightly damp hair.

"I heard what you said to Callie the other night." Stef admitted after a bit of silence. "I'm so proud of you for how well you've accepted her."

"I like her." Mariana said. "She's nice, she's so smart too." She admitted. A silence once again fell as they both thought of the other girl that now lived in their home. "She's guarded though." Mariana added wistfully. "She won't admit it but I think she's scared."

Stef nodded silently, this observation was something she herself had made, the problem was that she wasn't sure how to go about fixing it just yet. But one thing she knew for sure - she _was_ going to fix it.


	12. Chapter 12

As Stef walked into Brandon's room early that evening she didn't know what to expect for all she really had to go on was the vague comments she had overheard Mariana make to Callie.

"Hey B, can we talk for a minute?" Stef asked her son as they entered his room and found him at his desk with some music in front of him.

"About what?" Brandon asked, turning around in his chair to face Stef who sat down on his bed.

"Mariana." Stef answered in just one word, hoping to get some reaction from Brandon that will giver some insight into how he felt.

Brandon sighed in defeat as he looked away from his mother. "Little rat." He mumbled in disgust.

"Hey now." Stef said in disappointment. "Mariana hasn't told us anything." She defended her daughter.

"Well I didn't do anything for her to tell." Brandon shot back, hoping to quickly fill up the hole he'd just barely started digging for himself.

"You know, your defensive attitude just makes me believe otherwise." Stef replied, unhappy with the way that Brandon was behaving.

"So what do you want me to say?" Brandon asked.

"They are your brother and sister, B." Stef said once it became clear that Brandon was still angry with them and hadn't forgiven them.

"So what?" Brandon asked back angrily. "That doesn't give them a right to behave this way. That woman abandoned them and we took them in when they had no one so why does she suddenly matter so much?" He refused to justify their actions. "Look, I know that their life sucked and all the but that doesn't give them the right to take my mother away from me." He said venomously, emphasizing on the word _my_."

"I'm their mom too Brandon." Stef responded, not at all liking the way that he was dismissing them. It had taken her weeks to finally convince her twins that they were still a part of this family, still loved and wanted and not at all responsible for her being shot and she wasn't about to let all that hard work be erased just because Brandon was still angry.

"What difference does that make?" Brandon replied with just as much force. "Whoever they are and wherever they came from, they still nearly took my mother away from me." He glared in anger. "Look, I know that you love them and you have forgiven them but doesn't mean that I have to." He added, before giving Stef a chance to even respond. "You can make me apologize and you can even make me be nice to them but you cannot make me forgive them." He finished bitterly.

Stef was at a loss for it was true - no matter how much she hated his kind of defiance, especially when it came with such bravado, there was no way for her to control how Brandon felt about the twins.

Brandon took this opportunity to try and explain, "You love them, I get it; but I matter too and I want my mom and I can't forgive someone who nearly got her killed." He explained as best he could as tears formed in his eyes as the memory of the fear he'd felt at nearly losing his mother once again resurfaced.

Stef's demeanor finally softened as she looked at her son - the eldest of her children; the one she already viewed as practically an adult even though he was still only sixteen. He was still a child and he lived in a safe little bubble that his parents had made for him and that bubble had very nearly popped and he was scared and instead of trying to understand what he was feeling they had ridiculed him for his reactions. Maybe his life hadn't been as difficult and unstable as the twins but that didn't make his feelings any less important.

"Baby." Stef said softly as she finally reached for Brandon's hand and pulled him onto the bed next to her. She stroked his cheek lovingly as she tried to figure out a way to explain things to him in a way that he would understand and finally accept. "They weren't trying to hurt anyone." She justified. "They just wa…"

But before she could finish Brandon just shrugged out of her grasp and shook his head in resignation for even in her attempts to console him, it was only their feelings and motives that she cared about. "Forget it." He whispered in defeat as he went back to the sheets of music he had been working on.

Stef sat there for a few moments more as she watched her son wondering if things were ever going to be the same again for each child had changed so much since the shooting and what scared her the most is that their relationships had changed as well. Finally, feeling just as resigned as Brandon in the moment, she got up and walked out of the room.

* * *

Lena quietly crept back to her room right before Stef walked out of Brandon's room. She was finally beginning to see the problem - Brandon was angry with the twins for the fright they had all gotten but it was Stef's approach towards the situation that was keeping him from forgiving them and Lena was pretty sure that neither mother nor son could see it. Yes, Stef had nearly died but in the end things had turned out fine and he should have settled down by now but the truth was that Brandon had lost her - only he had lost her to the twins. If he didn't love and forgive them then his feelings were wrong; his anger was wrong and Stef was only fighting for their security - not his. In Stef's eyes Brandon had had a good life, despite the divorce and Mike's drinking. He had a safe and stable family and it was his duty to pay it forward. But Brandon was her son and privileged or not, he had a right to a safe and secure life without a toll being levied in exchange. The lack of empathy and understanding from his own mother seemed to be a punishment for his basically scandal-free life. It was Stef that had to change her expectations in order for the whole family to heal.


End file.
